October 20, 2019

wow 1 YEAR LATER!!

who still read blogs?!  haha I decided I'm coming back to this to record my journey as I am on my way to the newest version of sasa. sasa v.5.0!! so much has happened in a very short period but trust me, the lessons are ALOT &  HUGE. there are so many happy moments, and also some painful ones, but I am thankful regardless. have I not experienced all of those things, I wouldn't be here, writing this, because this feels like a turning point for me. I can sort of feel it that this is gonna be a journey that I will be proud of.  this is the right time to reset and re-focus on who I am, who I wanna be, what I wanna do, and what is important to me. and I'm figuring it all out as I go. do not expect perfect blog posts from now on,  there will be a lot of random things and also a lot of grammatical error (I can't be bothered to edit and make it perfect) everything will be raw and unfiltered.

7 THINGS to sum up what happened the past year.

- I traveled to a country I've never been to before (Japan)
- I dated someone who I met on a dating app last year. had a great few months before everything started to crumble down. although it was short-lived, I can safely say that it was one of the most important relationships I had. I learned A LOT about myself and I had a lot of realizations about life and relationship.
- My mom passed away. I never experienced this kind of loss before and it gave a new perspective in life. Not only that, with her passing, I got a chance to look inward and discovered things about myself which I failed to recognize before.
- Got a pet, and then it passed away.
- Practicing scripting. I just started about a month ago. And so far, it helps me a lot. maybe I will talk more about it next time. I really enjoy it and plan to continue doing this practice.
- Getting a clearer understanding of what I wanna do with my creative side. 

I did a photoshoot for my art. and start experimenting with new forms of creativity.
- Reunited with old friends.

To end this first post. I am gonna write down two quotes that I am loving recently:

"Watch your thoughts for they become words.
watch your words for they become actions.
watch your actions for they become habits.
watch your habits for they become character.
watch your character for it becomes your destiny.
" - Lao Tzu 

what I take from these quotes :
it's so IMPORTANT to guard our thoughts. as a heavy thinker, this is something that I am struggling with but I am learning continuously to really choose what consumes my mind.

"all relationship is a reflection of your relationship with yourself" - Deepak Chopra. 

what I take from these quotes:
This statement speaks so loud to me. truth to be told, I wasn't really kind to myself and I did not protect and respect myself enough and I think that is why I ended up staying in a relationship but I wasn't truly happy, simply because I wasn't happy with myself.
I have compromised some of my most important values, and I have projected my unhappiness towards the other person. That's why the relationship sucks ass. It is so important that we have a healthy relationship with ourselves before we could have a healthy relationship with others. lesson re-learned. 

I have overcome so many bumps in my life and I know that things happen FOR me (instead of  TO me) and I can always choose to see the good in every situation. for every single great thing that has happened in the past one year, I am EXTREMELY grateful. there are not enough words to describe how thankful I am for the people that I met and for the happy moments I shared with them. And for the bad times,  I know there are important lessons behind them.  and now I am looking forward to starting fresh as sasa v.5.0!  this will be an epic journey ahead and I'm excited for whatever life has in store for me (even tho I don't know what is it yet, and I learn that its ok to not know :) )

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