March 23, 2014

12 THINGS That Show You Who You Really Are | PART I


I went through my bookmarks and found this article from thoughtcatalog that i saved last year. I decided to make my own version of 12 Things That Show You Who You Really Are ,this will be ideal for us to get to know each other and our own self better, do one too if you want! ;)

My ugly will come out when i lose my trust in people, either they lie or simply not telling the truth by playing this 'pretend to be dumb' games when i secretly know the truth. I just lose it. Esp if they're considered as my closest ones or people that i care the most. And then i'll begin to re-think everything, doubt about everything and i feel uncertain about everything that relates to them. The way i see them will completely change,it might never gonna be the same again. And I will start to slowly distance my self, they will know. 

It depends on whys. I don't get upset with people easily, i could be tolerant like that. I'll try to see and understand why some people being so difficult to deal with. I observe. But if somebody does wrong to my homies, i'll be easily effected, i will nicely confront them if its necessary. 

But if it's because of my own mistakes, i'll just rant a little to my self, and then i will find a way to feel relieved (i write, eat or simply just hit my sack and sleep) and then i'll move on.
I don't keep sadness, nor anger. That's just not my thing. 

I've been taught that if you wanna be kind, then be kind. Do not expect anyone to do the same in return. I've met millions of ignorant everywhere. I cared for people but either they took it as an advantage, misunderstood it, or simply just did not notice. I kinda get used to it now. I know it's frustrating not being appreciated but as cliche, as it sounds, when you do good to people, you got nothing to lose. It never goes to waste. 

I talk to my self... a lot. 

We usually accept something that reflects our self.
The teenage Sasa tend to fell for someone who just as broken as she was. Someone who has such a dark past, or childhood know, problematic teenage like that. Somehow, I feel the need to let them know that i understand how they feel. The need to give them hope. I feel the need to FIX them just as much as i needed to be fixed. But as time goes on, I've learned in a hard way that it's not our job to fix people.

However, after having the ability to understand my self better, i realized that someone who can handle situations is the kind of person i will prone to choose. Probably because i'm the eldest kid in the family and i get used to leading. I will choose a gentleman who has the tendency to take care of things and has responsibility. Someone who can MAN UP and call me to sit and talk if there's a problem, not someone who acts stupid and run like a 5 years old boy hiding inside the cupboard after they make a mess in the living room. Someone who has control over themselves (as in emotionally, physically, spiritually) usually wins my biggest respect. 

I have no problem admitting my fault if i have to. And will apologize. 

My apologies consist of being a perfectionist (as my friends say), too straight forward, hard to read, and stubborn. 



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